Friday, August 15, 2008

The Loosening* of my Shackles...

My baby girl is growing up!!! She has been eating every 1.5-2 hours since she was born. Without fail, this is a girl that likes to eat often. The past few days, however, she has been going a little bit longer in between feedings so that she is now starting to eat closer to every 3 and sometimes (eek!) 4 hours. I know I should be happy about this, I no longer have to worry as much about whether or not she'll get hungry while I'm running errands or getting housework done. I'm strangely saddened though. First of all eating every 1.5 hours is great, because it means I can sit down, take a break and do some bloggy stuff, or read, or watch a movie, or just relax with my little one. I know this sounds silly and whiny to all of you that have several children, but now that amount of "me" time will be significantly reduced.

Even worse, and the thing that scares me the most is now I have to start being a real mom! Up to now (well other than the first three colic-filled months) we have still been spending most of our days eating and napping, with some play time thrown in the mix during her awake times. Now that she is awake more often, and eating less I have to find new ways to entertain her and keep her occupied and happy. I'm a little afraid that I'm not going to be able to, and that I'll be a boring, educationally stunting mom!

The absolute scariest thing of all of this is that Michaela is growing up. When I was still measuring her age in weeks I thought that her colic would never end and that I would be spending the rest of my life rocking/walking/soothing/crying/pulling my hair out! Then the colic miraculously passed and the next three months were magical. Philip was out of work for the summer, Michaela was no longer in pain. Even though we were busy sometimes with getting the house ready to sell, it was so nice. Now school is starting up again, Philip is going back to work and Michaela and I have to adjust to this next phase in our relationship. Its exciting but terrifying at the same time thinking about how quickly these months have passed, and how quickly the next 18 years will pass. Before I know it Michaela will be toddling around....then starting school....then asking to go place with friends....then asking to go on dates with boys....then moving out....then getting married and having kids of her own! Yikes!

Oh my little one, please stay small for as long as possible.

*I don't really know if loosening is a word. It must be, but it sounds so weird. Oh well.